Rockstar Veg - Deep Fried Brussel Sprouts

Ok, this may not be a long post but it is a cool one. If you have never tried this before, but want to, then run, don't walk to your kitchen fryer. Or your turkey fryer...

Simplicity at it's best. I probably had the most chill Thanksgiving ever this year. No guests. Just me and the Boo and the baby girl.

Now, I won't lie. Felt rather indulgent to have Tgiving all by ourselves. But that's not to say that we wouldn't have loved the company but this holiday, we wanted to hang in Hawai'i. We can plan our mainland visits whenever it suits so that's what we decided to do. And we loved every stinking minute of it.

But, that is not to say we didn't cook. Oh, we cooked... but part of what we discovered when planning our Thanksgiving dinner this year was how luxurious it really is to cook whatever the hell you want and know that there won't be the random dish that some random relative decided was good enough to bring in exchange for the really really good eats the rest of the family slaves away to make and share. Oh yea, there's always "one of those" in every family. But, it's all in the gathering and the total humor of it all, so still, I kinda missed that part.

Anyway, this year, since we could make whatever we want and didn't have to, out of obligation/devotion/madness, make anything we didn't want to, it was stellar!!

Dividing up the cooking in our house, easy. Planning the execution, iffy, but pretty easy and that's only because unlike me, my partner needs almost perfect isolation in the kitchen when he's doing his thing. I can cook in total chaos. Hold a solid convo and cook, no, but still, I can manage. Sergeant Perfection must have order. So, hell, I give him all the space he needs to focus like the Iron Chef he actually is.

Truth be told, I like his serious approach and he delivers and that kind of focus, I appreciate too. We are both curious cats so keeping out of each other's way is harder than it sounds when you want to see what the other is up to. It's professional curiosity, I tell him. And that's the truth. My Star Lord of the Kitchen Stadium. (He's that funny, too.)

We agreed on the whole menu. Agreed on the plan, the execution and worked the plan, as Star Lord expresses it. It was a dream and we both got such a kick out of how easy our dinner was. Almost sans stress entirely. Except he is a Cowboys fan, which we have to excuse and ignore. Other than that, total drama free, complete and utter indulgence.

My favorite thing this Thanksgiving turned out to be the Rockstar Brussel Sprouts. Who knew? Who knew you can make yourself sick eating brussel sprouts? It's a real thing, people. You can. As one of my closest friends pointed out: "of all things to make yourself sick over, you chose brussel sprouts? What the hell, Tinker Bell? I ate 2 pies, you ate 2 lbs of brussel sprouts. I hate you."

But dude, these brussel sprouts were kinda inspired by some hilarious episode of holiday Chopped or something. Guy's Grocery Games. No idea, but I remember saying, hey! That's a damn good idea.

That's just what we did. Fry the turkey. Drop the sprouts. Boom! By the time the bird had rested, the sprouts were perfectly done and boy, oh boy! FREAKING THE BOMB.

I added my own little twist, check this out:
White truffle oil
Fresh parmesan cheese
salt, pepper
minced garlic, optional

Just grated the parm, drizzled in a little truffle oil, salt and pepper and tossed the lot. Done. The garlic, we did the second time we made them in the same week. lol! Seriously, that good.

Dipping sauce (if you need it):
Reaper Aioli or
Thai sweet chili sauce or
your favorite sauce

We used peanut oil for our frying, as usual. I think the temp was right around 350-375 degrees F. I don't think it took more than 10 minutes but you definitely know they are done when they begin to caramelize and look like they may burn. They won't really but you will also see that the brussels will "bloom" like a little flower and open up it's outter leaves ever so slightly. Perfect. If you aren't sure, pop one out and eat it. But careful, they are hella hot right out of the fryer.

A few days later, despite overdoing it the first time, we made them again. Yes, that good... but this time we did it in our little kitchen deep fryer and again, total perfection. And I ate too many, but beside the point.

Now, we had other stuff for Thanksgiving like Star Lord's mother's oyster dressing. Turned out almost perfectly but like I said, he is the perfectionist, not I. I loved it but he knows the bar is kinda high and he also knew that I know if it's not the same as his Mom's. She is a serious, serious pro. Hm, kinda makes some sense, huh? ;)

All day we were both getting texts from Mama expressing concern about the whole process. It was hilarious. But she knows him well and sticking to the recipe ain't one of his strong suits. Still. It was de-freaking-licious. The only thing he said was, "Please don't tell Mama." lol! Ok, Groot. Secret is safe with me.

I have my own take on that recipe I'd love to try and I might just do it one random night next year...Roland, my brother in law's bff, does his mother's oyster dressing and it is also to die for. But his mom's has hot Cajun jalapeno sausage as well as oysters and I love that version, too. But if I tried to do that without a trial run on a less thankful day, it's asking for trouble in the Dirty South.

So, as usual, I did have a longish story for a short recipe. Oh well. C'est la vie au Hawai'i... Hope you enjoy this lovely turn on a classic Thanksgiving staple. I won't be going back to any other way of cooking them any time soon. And I just might make them again this week.

Monkey Bread - For All Your Favorite Monkeys

Oh my gosh, is this ever an easy evening snack or quick dinner party starter or a great breakfast treat for crazy monkeys.

I think that I'll make this savory version for our next family movie night which we like to do when it's cool enough to have the outdoor fireplace going.

We roast marshmallows, little smokies and Tsunami will set up the flatscreen tv so we can watch the movie outside by the pool, sit by the fire and have snacks right in the garden. Quite lovely and festive.

I got this idea after having traditional monkey bread with my girlfriend and her little girl. Something we love and have made together before. But because we wanted a quick fix, we decided to cut the whole process short and use biscuits in a can instead of making the monkey bread dough from scratch.

No time for that with a 6 year old! Instant gratification is more important and so, we made it together the night before and put plastic wrap on top in the fridge so we would have it the next morning. She liked rolling the dough balls and we worked on the sugared mixture.

Quick Fix Monkey Bread:

• biscuits, cut in half or quarters, rolled into balls
• buttered or oiled bundt pan

Traditional Sweet Flavors:

• 1 stick of butter
• 1/4 c sugar
• 1/4 c brown sugar
• 1/4 tsp cinnamon
• 1 tsp vanilla

Savory American Flavors:

• Bacon, crispy and crumbled
• Wisconsin Sharp Cheddar (or Vermont)
• Chives or Green Onions, (optional garnish)
• Melted butter

Savory Italian Flavors:

• Sopressata chopped
• Parmesan cheese
• green olives chopped
• Parsley chopped (optional garnish)
• olive oil

Savory Mexican Flavors:

• Chorizo, fresh or cured
• Quesadilla cheese
• Red onions, diced
• Cilantro, chopped (optional garnish)
• olive oil

For the sweet monkey bread:
Melt the butter, sugars, vanilla and cinnamon in a saucepan on the stove over medium heat, mixing thoroughly before hand but not stirring while it heats up. This prevents sugar crystalizing and allows the mixture to caramelize and thicken. Once the sugar has melted and dissolved, turn off the heat.

Dump all dough balls into the warmed sugar mixture and then dump the whole pan of sugared dough into the buttered or greased bundt pan.

Optionally, you can also add raisins soaked in Brandy or Cognac, which I love, but since we were making these for the youngster, we opted to leave this out and just do plain.

While we were baking these, which we baked for about 30 minutes on 350 F, our hungry munchkin asked if we could make some icing. Of course! So the pretty little princess helped and that's what we did.

Icing:

• 1 cup of powdered sugar
• 1 tsp of vanilla
• 2 tbsp of milk or enough to make the consistency you desire
• 1 princess to stir until it's perfect

For the savory monkey bread:
Put dough balls and all savory ingredients into a bowl and gently fold to mix everything thoroughly. Dump the whole mess into a bundt pan and drizzle with your favorite olive oil or melted butter.

Bake at 350 for about 30 minutes.

To serve any version, turn out onto a serving dish and serve immediately.

Cracker Time - Parmesan and Thyme Crackers

Got this recipe watching Ina Garten's Barefoot Contessa episode where she makes brunch for her best friend. She served these crackers as part of a cheese and cracker platter with fruit which looked so beautiful, decorated with fresh greens and lovely bits out of her garden. Yep, right up my alley.

Since we are planning a family Easter Sunday at our house next weekend, we've been in the process of menu planning, as you might be. We had decided that we would do the same thing since we have a lovely assortment of cheeses and of course, my first charcuterie that I've been dying to introduce to the world. 

My first Lonzino, which is a cured pork tenderloin with juniper, rosemary, salt, pepper and fennel turned out so lovely that it shocked my whole household. 

Totally supportive of my kitchen experiments and food chemist wizardry, Tsunami was all too willing and anxious to try it but deep down I think he was a tad skeptical. That's ok; I love to be underestimated and truth be told, I wasn't entirely sure either. And what's better than unexpectedly impressing someone you love with something you made? Nothing, really.

But since everything seemed to go perfectly according to the recipes in my book, I felt at least confident I had a 50/50 chance of it turning out ok. I mean, peeps have been curing meats for thousands of years, how hard can it be?

Oh joy! Not only did it turn out ok, but it was truly divine and a total culinary delight! Yipppeeee!!

I asked him to check on it one night and suddenly, during my evening swim, he comes outside and says to me, "OH. MY. Gosh... Totally f-ing amazing! Here, honey, gotta try this right now." 

I swim over and he gives me the slice that he has precariously carried on his carving knife all the way outside.  "Right???" he says, clearly impressed with the results. 

Even though he was discreetly skeptical, it didn't stop him from assisting me with some mechanics during the curing process of my "experiment". He cleverly converted a small outdoor refrigerator we keep by the pool for beer and soda and turned it into the perfect meat curing humidor! Perfect temperature and humidity for the sausage making endeavor, which required a constant temperature of 55 degrees F and 65% humidity. (It also serves as a cheese curing fridge, but that's another culinary adventure waiting to begin :)

Tickled to death, we both have cheese, crackers and Lonzino as a little post-workout snack. And so, our menu planning for Easter had begun...

Now that we have the cured meat for the platter figured out and the assorted cheeses, we decided that of course, time to make our own crackers, as well! Thanks, Ina. Just love you to death and appreciate this addition to our Easter Sunday supper!

Here's what you need to get started:
¼ pound (1 stick) unsalted butter, at room temperature
4 ounces freshly grated Parmesan cheese (about 1 cup)
1 teaspoon minced fresh thyme leaves
½ teaspoon kosher salt
½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1¼ ups all-purpose flour

Prep:
In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment, cream the butter for 1 minute. With the mixer on low speed, add the Parmesan, thyme, salt, and pepper and combine. With the mixer still on low, add the flour and combine until the mixture is in large crumbles, about 1 minute. If the dough is too dry, add 1 teaspoon water.

Dump the dough onto a floured board, press it into a ball, and roll into a 9-inch log. Wrap in plastic and refrigerate for at least 30 minutes or for up to 4 days. 

**Alternatively, I put the dough into a ziplock baggie, seal the baggie and roll the dough out flat in the bag. Refrigerate and then when ready to roll, you simply cut the ziplock bag away and cut with cookie cutters for little shapes or use a pastry cutter to make strips or squares, etc. Learned this tip from Alton Brown and it makes it pretty easy once the dough is cold and there is little to no mess to clean up!

Baking:
Meanwhile, preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Cut the log into 3/8-inch-thick rounds with a small, sharp knife and place them on a sheet pan lined with parchment paper. Bake for 22 minutes, until very lightly browned. Rotate the pan once during baking. Cool and serve at room temperature. 

Serve:

You can certainly serve these any way you like, but we'll likely follow Ina's lead and create a lovely platter with fresh, seasonal fruit like mangos, red grapes, fresh pineapple, various cheeses and of course, the secret star to my little cheese plate party: my first Lonzino! 

**Don't worry, if you are interested and want to try your hand at cured meats, I am working on a companion post for just that, so stay tuned!